Taking Cues From The Sign Posts Of Life

Life is a mysterious journey which is, and can only be understood by the Giver and Creator of it thereof. It has got lessons wrapped up beautifully and well packaged just for our consumption. The lessons of life are in sessions, episodes which unveils at every stage of it.

At every stage in life, such priceless lessons are being mounted like sign posts which behooves on us to read, comprehend, and apply it to our lives. Thinking aloud, what does a sign post do? What’s the purpose for mounting them? Are they what we need as humans? A sign post has got instructions inscribed on it, and it gives direction both to the wise and unwise, to the learned and unlearned.

An interesting fact is, the Creator never looked elsewhere for who and what should appear on the numerous sign posts but rather used His ‘creatures’. For humans, God used other humans to be an example to their fellows, likewise in plants and animals. Amongst all of God’s creatures, it’s only humans that feel pompous to learn from these sign posts!

These sign posts we’re talking about, if you’re lost, are the lives that others have lived (what others have seen or heard before growing up), and thus should serve as guidelines for us to learn from, so we don’t repeat the same mistakes they made.

Many are those who could have gone far in life if they had heeded to the inscriptions on such sign posts. They felt too proud to learn, some consciously, others unconsciously. They stumbled and thus became sign posts for others. That’s not bad but they could’ve done better, of which they’re aware!

Young people of today would rather resort to ‘near-insults’ when they are cautioned against dangerous paths and would prefer having it their way. We feel we’re well informed about life much more than any one is hence such warnings/advises become bogus.

Never forget, life is best lived from mistakes. Learning from the vulnerabilities of others makes us strong going forward. Taking a cue from the life of a father, mother, an uncle or any elderly person may prove beneficial as we go through ours.

Let’s make conscious efforts to make our journey through life a better one. Live life to the full, learn from the mistakes of others to avoid a stumble halfway through. Never feel too big to learn, especially from the one ahead of you for he/she may have stepped on thorns that you’re yet to step on. Never become a sign post halfway through life…. (Anyway, I zip my mouth).

#DontFeelPompousToLearn
#SignPostsTeachBetter

New WhatsApp Has Text Formatting Toolbar & Support For Sharing All File Types!

An update to WhatsApp, as posted on July 12, comes with a formatting tool bar; bold, italics and strike through options for text enhancement in chat. What more, the new update also allows users to share all forms of documents and files; with apk and other file extensions included! As if that’s not enough, there’s easy photo sharing in the new update!

Find below, a highlight of the new features:

• You can now send documents of any type. To send a document, open a chat, tap attach — document.

• From the in-app camera, you can now swipe up to see all of your photos and videos.

• When typing text in a chat, you can tap and hold to select the text to easily bold, strikethrough, or italicize it.

This gesture displays the formatting toolbar in WhatsApp

• Various design improvements for voice and video calls.

Formatting Toolbar: Appears After Long Pressing Text(s)

These updates are currently available to Android users but the company, WhatsApp Inc. promises to rollout the same for iOS users very soon.

So what are you waiting for, Android users? Go on, UPDATE your app and start flaring!

Limit Me To Occupy Me

If you couldn’t make me happy, why did you ask me to put away all my friends? Exclaimed Monica! Josh had proposed marriage to Monica, and since that very day Monica accepted the proposal, it has been all Josh throughout. He’s been like a boss, always instructing Monica to do this one thing or the other. The more fascinating aspect of it was when Josh asked Monica to put away all her friends for his sake, with assurances of being not just a potential husband to her, but also a friend.

Josh started quite well, and for about a month, Monica never seemed to have missed her friends, because Josh demonstrated that he was in to make it thick for her. Few days after a month of joy and happiness came the time of pain and anguish. Josh began pacing the profitable time he spends with her, more like a ‘variable interval’. The Psychology people will understand.

A life full of assurances in the twinkling of an eye generated into a life full of excuses. Josh hardly got time for her, and that left her stranded. She was thinking of going back to her friends least did she know that her actions, which was instigated by Josh’s demands had driven them away from her. To cut the long story short, the marriage was never meant to be since Monica couldn’t guarantee her ultimate happiness in Josh, a man who limits and can’t occupy!

This is not just limited to relationships or love lives, but it cut across all life’s endeavours. A boss who’s not ready to provide his employee with the tools necessary for carrying out his/her duties can not restrain the employee from talking to other companies where he/she can be guaranteed such tools to facilitate his work.

Parents who are not willing to buy ‘toys’ for their little boy to play with, has got little to no chance of stopping their child from visiting their next door neighbour whose son has got a lot of toys to play with. Likewise a political leader who can’t guarantee his followers the best of treatment risks losing them out to his opponents.

 

A pastor who can’t be relied on by his members for anointing, revival, words of truth (salvation) and wisdom and breakthrough can’t restrict his members from joining other churches where these things are seen and realised.

We can and should not guarantee others what we can’t offer. We cannot place limits on the lives of others when we can’t really occupy them. Never take away a pleasant situation from a person, with the promise of being the substitute of such a situation when in actual sense you can’t fill the vacuum left by the pleasant situation.

Make it a point today to either not to limit people, or to limit them and occupy them. Don’t start if you can’t finish! If you know you can’t occupy, don’t limit! Every limitation should be met by an equal occupation…(I zip my mouth)!

The Uncertainties In Seeking Counselling (Part One)

When a local delicacy is garnished to look like a spaghetti vingrannette, local folks may grow hesitant to take a bite due to the precariousness of the taste. But what happened to the “yɛrekɔbisa abrewa” (we are going to ask the old sage) days? I guess it was all in pursuit of what we did not understand. If I had my way, I would campaign that uncertainties should not deprive us from new discoveries. After all, the sweetness of the pudding lies in the eating.

Culture wise, a quintessential Ghanaian man is likely to gain a captains’ armband as a real man when he keeps his problems to himself. The seniority of it is when at the highest intensity he manages to pace up and down without showing any sign of being weighed down. The worse of this is the aftermath of the Beijing Women’s Conference, which has incited women to rub shoulders with men as fellow counterparts. Women, nowadays, also want a share of the armband or set out to compete with their own version.

However, in our quest to uphold an ancient legacy, we should not forget that it is the same inhabitants of the ancient times who found wisdom in the saying, “hu m’ani so ma me nti na atwe mmienu nam” (meaning the urgency to clear a peck in the eye has made antelopes move in pairs). Apparently, no matter how a person would want to keep to himself/herself, there is always a bosom friend he/she shares egg from the same shell with. The Asante’s call it, “nadamfo a ɔne no bɔ kosua tafere”.

I have no shred of doubt that you would acquiesce that the preceding paragraph defeats the belief that keeping your problems to yourself makes you a hero or to be adjudged as ‘well composed’. One way or the other, it becomes necessary to share.

But who do you share with?
Not to be in a haste to point a finger at who to share with, let us remind ourselves with the sayings of the sages of the old times which go like, “suro nipa na gyae saman” (fear humans rather than to fear ghost) and “sɛ aboa bi bɛka wo a, na efiri wo ntoma mu” (the insect that will bite you would be from your cloth). These sayings also make sharing with a bosom friend not 100% appropriate, right? Well, it could always go for a starter, notwithstanding.

Who then is it 100% appropriate to share with?
I will confidently say, the office of the psychologist or the counsellor. The psychologist/counsellor is the one who by virtue of the ethics guiding his profession makes it binding unto himself to keep what you share as safe as baby’s sigh. Thus, the paramount nature of confidentiality has created a form of a lock that prevents what you share from eluding.
But the proposed Psychologist or Counsellor is a total Stranger, not even an acquaintance to begin with.

Of course yes, no two ways about that. However, the psychologist/counsellor who seeks to assist you to quash your problems or come to terms with your conflicts, employs professional, effective approach and techniques that could be akin to a magic wand.
At your first meeting with a psychologist/counsellor, his/her reception has the tendency to wipe off 5% of your problems. His/her smiles and professional gestures that would be laced through the entire session can also take away 10% of your worries. At this point you would begin to feel that your load is getting lighter. Your own excitement after this realization can also subtract 15%.

Now you will feel no need to keep part but unleash all. The psychologist/counsellor’s patience to listen with no stains of judgment or condemnation could lift 50% load off your shoulders. You would now have the space to heave a deep sigh; my cup of worries is almost empty! At this juncture, the psychologist’ approach and techniques employed to discuss the case presented has the efficacy of clearing the remaining 20%. I believe you now know why the psychologist/counsellor is the 100% appropriate person to share your problems with.

To conclude, let me add that, we should not hesitate to explore the fortunes that the psychologist/the counsellor bears. No form of uncertainty should deprive us from discovering the relief in the office of the psychologist. No problem is unsurmountable. Worries do not add a block to a construction. Do not wait till your situation beckons you to tie the rope or swallow the pills.
Let us walk to the office of the psychologist/counsellor earlier, and I can bet on my psychology degree, we will come out refreshed and grateful.

 

Let’s kill the Internet Rumors!

Have you ever seen these?

• Rush Energy drink kills 8 in Nigeria and counting

• LMG Sleeps With Dogs (Video)

• Coca-Cola infected with HIV

• Facebook Privacy Changed Once More!!!

• Michelle Obama texting during National Anthem

• Human foot sold as food

• Saved by an Angel; man being rescued from oncoming truck

• The story of a dog named Tank

• Eagles attempt to snatch child

• Obamacare implants microchip (666 implants)

• Worms sold in hamburgers

• Picture of a mad immigrant (woman)

• Human flesh used as “corned beef” in China?”

Just to quote but few!

 Yes, you may have come across some of these topics as they make their way through people’s pages and that of yours (probably)…the circulation goes on, you may have forwarded them on social sites, networks and apps. But the BIG QUESTION is: “are they really standing out to be true as published?”

 That’s a big question though, you may have wondered about what a RUMOR is?

information or a story that is passed from one person to another and which may or may not be true”-LDOCE (Longman Dictionary of contemporary English), defines.

Now you are questioning me about whether those rumors are true or not?

Well, I’m not here to say “Yes” or “No”, but please think about these well.

 You may have known the dangers associated with such rumors. The damages effected to the individuals or parties involved are often catastrophic and irreversible.

How would you feel if you learnt that your friends were spreading false information about you?

 Now le’me ask you this: have you ever helped to spread any of such rumors, often on the internet via social sites, networks and related Apps?

Also, how do rumors start? In answering this question, the Watchtower said:

 “…Often it is impossible to say. A loose comment by someone may be picked up, repeated and exaggerated. The suggestion that something might happen can easily become an assertion that it will happen, and then it may be turned to say it did happen. Even a joke can start a rumor if someone takes it seriously and repeats it.

Rumors spring up readily in a climate of fear… (*** w84 9/1 p. 21 Would You Spread a Rumor? ***)

 You may be shocked to hear,see or even read that a particular rumor you helped spread is false, that can really make you feel bad. To save yourself from such embarrassment, ***don’t retell a story until it becomes a proven history*** and that will help.

 The effects?

Quoting from the same source: “Such rumors have bad results. They make the one spreading them a liar,…they affect the reputation of the subject of the rumor. And they deceive the person who listens to the rumor, perhaps inciting him to act unwisely…”

 The way forward?

“…some stories we hear may be true. But common sense will tell us that in any nation, village or even organization, rumors will spread, especially rumors that reflect the basic desires or fears of the community. And there always exists a strong possibility that a rumor is, at best, a distortion of the truth. Hence, if you hear a story and cannot pinpoint the source of it, think for yourself and be sure of your facts before you pass it on to others.

 Remember, “in the abundance of words there does not fail to be transgression, but the one keeping his lips in check is acting discreetly.” (Proverbs 10:19)…” (*** w84 9/1 p. 23 Would You Spread a Rumor? ***).

This Article is part of the Series “Be Smart On The Internet“, Click to Read More.

Your Facebook Privacy & Other Settings

We often quote to say; “Prevention is better than cure”, but can I also say “protection is better than redemption?”

Well, this is especially useful when it comes to life on the internet―it’s always useful to use online resources to protect ourselves from the dangers imposed by the “bad guys” on the internet. Your Internet security should never be compromised.

In other to better understand me, let’s say the internet is an environment of human beings, a human community in this context, as it truly stands to be.

In every community of humans there always are friends and enemies, good people and the bad ones as well. Some well-wishers and bad-wishers are all mixed in the recipe of life and its activities. Some who always want to take advantage of others?

You see, you’ll never know there are people on the internet who always like to see others disadvantaged. People will just go the lengths to see other people suffer in one way or the other on the internet, the point is, they either want to set them on a humiliating platform or to shorten or end their cyber life.

You can be a victim to some of these people, so you need to take practical steps to do some prevention. And what are these steps? This article is related to all social sites but here, the emphasis is on Facebook.

  • Choose who you add as friends on social sites

There are a handful of people on the internet who like grains of sand, may be fine or coarse. People sign up for social sites usually with different names―not legal though. Some setup impersonated accounts to deceive others usually with the intention of taking advantage of other site users at the latter’s expense. A male can setup a female account and the versa. How can you ensure safety in this wise? Will you add anybody as a friend or follow them just because they have good-looking profile pictures or personal information that you are not sure is true?

Do you just accept requested invitations without checking for genuineness in the account profile of the requesting party? If you see a profile bearing the name and few details of a friend, please be sure they actually created it―you may want to call them or use their known email address to contact them for a confirmation. Always check the user’s page to make sure he is safe to add or accept as a friend, follower or following.

  • Set the right privacy options in your account section

Some social sites such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram among others allow their registered users to set privacy options for being followed, adding as friends, who can comment on their posts. This is a useful way of helping the account users control their privacy preferences. You can use these options from the account section settings or individual posts settings to control your audience. One useful way to control your audience is to set an option to review things they tag you before allowing or disallowing them on your personal page or timeline.

Though not difficult to get started, you may still need assistance to configure such settings if you are not well familiar with these settings. I will cover a detailed article on getting yourself started with these account settings but before then, you may want to visit the help page for the particular social site (Facebook, precisely). Better still, if you need to cover these settings up instantaneously, use this email (ask@philarpy.com) or “Contact Us” section on this website to seek my immediate help. I care and will always act as early as possible.

  • Limit the audience for your post using advance options

Do not permit anybody to access your posts, updates and responses. Using the advance account privacy options mentioned earlier in this article, set the right target audience―those who can see, like and comment on you updates, shared or those you are tagged; best of these are your confirmed friends.

Although your post may be set by default to be displayed to friends only, you may want to double check the audience type before hitting the post button.

  • Review tagged posts before allowing or disallowing them on your page (timeline)

While some friends will be caring enough to share with you educative and interesting “stuffs” on your timeline by tagging you (connecting your profile and timeline to the post they want to share with you), the bad folks will selfishly tag you with useless often morally degrading “stuffs”. Unless you have set up a Facebook timeline review, tagged posts will automatically be posted to your timeline. If a good folk should see such things, what will be their impression about you?

Be sure to control what appears on your timeline; take a review before allowing or disallowing them to keep your timeline clean. It’s worth your respect, trust and security. Be sure to submit any post you find disturbing (pictures, videos featuring immorality) to Facebook for review.

  • Block them, if they deserve

Are they persistently threatening your online security? Do they keep on spamming you even after several cautioning? Are they tagging you with pornographic or other morally decayed posts? Then it’s time to block them, it’s worth it. Use the Facebook option to block somebody you no longer want them to get involved with you.

Please be informed that, blocked contacts;

  • Will be unfriended
  • Won’t be able to see your profile information, even if they searched you on Facebook.
  • Won’t be able to contact you, via messenger on Facebook.

Only will they be able to contact you back if you unblocked them, you will have to be friends again (by request and confirmation).

This Article is part of the Series: “Be Smart On The Internet” Click to Read More.

How Long Will You Remain Motivated While You Do Nothing?

Life presents us with numerous options every single day. To make a choice seems the way to go but a better choice is more preferable! Most of us are cool and relaxed with always being on the receiving end of the maze and are not given to reciprocating the same gesture. Some of us always love to receive but frowns and tend to withhold when we are to give.

There’s greatness embedded in every single soul, and such greatness takes no one to unleash it but yourself” -Paa Kwesi Mensah-

Many have lost track of such a fact! We always sit and wait for us to be pushed before we start doing something. We are fond of sitting on the fence while observing proceedings from afar when we should get down there and showcase what we’ve got!

For how long will we remain motivated while we do nothing? Don’t we have anything to offer the world? Don’t we know that we possess something unique that is and will be beneficial to others? Can we always be at the receiving end of the puzzle of life when we can do and give much more than we’re receiving? We love to be motivated and inspired by the innovations of others, have we weighed the uniqueness of our innovations and how it’ll help lift someone out of the dungeon to the mountain top should we bring it to life? We have no idea!

It is baffling sometimes to behold a ‘man’ born by a woman feeling inferior. Some of us have allowed timidity to become entangled webs and albatrosses on our necks, hence preventing us from becoming an inspiration to others. The timidity often has the propensity of escalating into FEAR (false evidence appearing real).

The way forward? We should drop the habit of being passive humans and start being active. We should quit being mere receivers and start being conscious givers. Self belief is crucial, so we have to believe in ourselves, and in our innovations. Have this in mind, there’s always someone out there who can only be motivated by you!

We should psych ourselves up to the point that we won’t be made to feel timid or be afraid when we’re called upon to showcase what we’ve got to offer. Let’s place ourselves in positions where our qualities will be needed.

Make a decision today to be a motivation to someone. Come out of your shell and show the world what you’re made up of! Don’t sit down there, rise up and get things done for you alone can do it! The world won’t wait for you so, WAKE UP, GO OUT THERE, SHOWCASE YOUR QUALITIES, BE A MOTIVATION! YES YOU CAN! (I zip my mouth).

#BeAnInspiration
#YouCan

The Internet and you, why it matters?

To me, using the internet is so interesting, much more than fun, entertainment and experience. You may also have wondered about how the internet has gone a long way to provide so many intriguing benefits to you, myself and the rest of the human family; talking about research, exploring, connecting, just to mention but few.

There are times when you come across so many things and I mean everything springing from what you need and those you don’t, some of the worse being so abhorring. Can we, I mean you and me plus the entire ‘cyber-related’ people overlook the fact that the internet as it is can be a ‘wave of disaster’ to humanity?

I’m not alone when it comes to the fact that some internet related stuffs can be so disgusting. There are times when you are busy browsing for priceless information, then suddenly here it comes! Of course you know what I am saying? Nudity, explicit image files, pornography and the likes. The annoying stuff you don’t want to see!  Then quickly you have to turn that internet page off.

It is indeed as they say, true that ‘formerly, dogs hunted for bones but these days, bones avail themselves for dogs with limited efforts of hunting or none at all’.

The Internet has also in recent times been a bridge of transport that transfers rumors to the most distant part of the world.

With social networks and Apps such as Facebook, WhatsApp and the others, listing but few, the rate of transporting false information and rumors some of which tarnishes the image of honest famous people and big companies can never be underestimated.

What about the cases of connecting with friends over the internet across countries and other borders? Connecting with friends over the internet, some of those we know little or nothing at all about (them) can be dangerous. Why? Some friends can be imposters and can harm us, running into our privacy and releasing a good factor of our online information.

In view of these, I made a bunch of important research to publish a document of some important ways to be smart on the internet and how to protect ourselves; you and me, plus the rest of the internet related folks.

Read the series of “Be Smart on the Internet” to learn more.